Village Girl Heroine: Chapter 3

Chapter 3: A completely nonsensical¹ adventuring party

Translator: yuzu

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Lin Tianyin couldn’t remember exactly what happened last night. Her last memory was being pulled away by a crowd of extremely emotional villagers while she was biting a huge turkey, and then… she couldn’t recall anything else.

In short, when Lin Tianyin woke up, she had a splitting headache. But then she found that her parents had unexpectedly cooked some meat and porridge for her. After ravenously wolfing down the meal, Lin Tianyin finally returned to a normal mental state. Only then did she realize exactly what she had done the previous night.

In the middle of the village, there was a red dragon that was bound in chains. Its muzzle was also locked with a thick shackle, and its coal black nostrils occasionally spewed small flames while it struggled desperately. However, when that rampaging red dragon saw Lin Tianyin, its eyes widened fearfully and it immediately quieted down.

After sorting things out for a bit, Lin Tianyin figured out roughly what happened — last night, she had smashed the skeleton knight whom the demon lord had sent to attack the village with a single punch of her fist, then mistaken the red dragon mount as delicious roast turkey, and promptly started nomming on it like a madwoman. Although you could say that the current demon lord’s minions were weaker than normal because the demon lord had just woken up, this turn of events was…

Who could have imagined that she was so deliriously hungry that something outrageous like this could happen… Lin Tianyin felt extremely humiliated, especially since the villagers were looking at her with eyes of reverence. One after another, they bluntly praised her:

“Hey! It’s the little fatty from the Minova family! Thanks to you, the village was saved!”

“Some time ago, I saw you tearing down the Tang² family house with your bare hands, but I never imagined that Shanoa was strong enough to defeat a dragon!”

“So even if the demon lord comes, we don’t have to be afraid right? Haha, I want my daughter to be as strong and sturdy as you!”

…Can you all stop talking, aunties and uncles?!³ I’m trying to lose weight!

Lin Tianyin felt a little broken by this plot development. In the original work, this village was supposed to have been burned down by the demon lord’s servants. With death and panic everywhere, Shanoa and Milona escaped it all by hiding in the basement. In the story, that fire dragon and skeleton knight were later slain by the prince, and the heroic act of vengeance caused Milona to fall in true love with the prince.

Now that she unwittingly altered the plot, Lin Tianyin was at a complete loss. Would the demon lord send even stronger monsters to kill them? Maybe it would be better to urge her parents to move to the capital, since it would be a little safer there. With the knights corps stationed there, even the demon lord wouldn’t dare attack the capital so casually…

Lin Tianyin decided to have a serious talk with her family. Presumably, now that they knew that the demon lord had awoken, it shouldn’t be too hard to convince them to move. However, when Lin Tianyin came home, she found her parents and Milona gravely sitting around the dining table like they were waiting for her to start a family meeting.

“I…”

Lin Tianyin felt a little strange. But just as she was about to speak, Milona opened her mouth and interrupted her by saying something outrageous.

“Let’s go defeat the demon lord, Shanoa!”

“…”

Lin Tianyin’s face was blank, as if she didn’t follow Milona’s train of thought.

Milona didn’t seem to pay attention to Lin Tianyin’s reaction. Seemingly full of fighting spirit, she brandished a fist as she spoke to Lin Tianyin: “I saw Shanoa last night! You’re seriously too amazing! According to legend, slaying a dragon is a sign that one has the ability to seal the demon lord. Since our family carries the blood of heroes who once sealed the demon lord, Shanoa must be the hero of our generation!”

“That’s a complete misunderstanding,” Lin Tianyin replied dully. “I was so hungry that I was hallucinating, and besides I didn’t kill any dragon.”

“You defeated a dragon, so it’s the same thing!” Milona seemed completely absorbed in her own world. She continued to implore Lin Tianyin passionately. “The demon lord has revived, and we can’t allow him to torment the people! As descendants of heroes, we should bear responsibility for sealing the demon lord. Mom will give us the magic scroll left behind by our ancestors. Now that the demon lord has resurrected, the world’s magic will return, and the low magic era will end.”

Milona had a completely earnest expression. Lin Tianyin stared dumbfounded at this female protagonist’s overwhelming fighting spirit. In the original work, the protagonist’s parents hadn’t told her anything, and she only learned the truth about the demon lord after visiting sage after sage with the prince’s party. Also, their ancestor’s healing magic scroll was also burnt to a crisp when their house burnt down, so in the later stages of the novel, Milona had to acquire greater recovery magic from her own effort. Now it looked like the story had completely deviated from its original trajectory…

Milona appeared extremely stubborn. Lin Tianyin thought to herself that there was no way her sister seriously intended to proceed, right? It must be a joke. Was her brain broken? How did she come up with such ridiculous ideas? She should just quietly wait for the prince to come to find her! Lin Tianyin pleadingly looked at her parents, hoping that they would say something to stop Milona!

But to her despair, her parents expressionlessly took out a rather ancient wooden chest, placed it in front of Lin Tianyin, and declared with an extremely serious look: “Milona is right. The demon lord has returned, so in order to save the world, we must shoulder the responsibility of putting the demon lord back to eternal rest as the heroes’ descendants.”

“But Mom… what can the two of us do alone…?” Lin Tianyin felt a burst of hopelessness as she realized that both Milona and her parents had such abnormal beliefs. Their ways of thinking were on totally different railroad tracks than hers.

“Mh, of course you won’t be alone! An adventuring party has already been formed!”

Mom clapped her hands somewhat happily and spoke: “Our neighbor Miller’s son, Miller Jr.⁴, has agreed to join your adventuring party.”

“Miller Jr.?! You’re joking?!” Lin Tianyin cried out in shock. ”All he knows how to do is plow farmland with a hoe! Is he going to fight with a garden hoe?!”

“Just have him hold a sword, it’s the same thing.” Their father interrupted Lin Tianyin. “As for the rest of the party, there’s also the village chief’s son Gagaf⁵… after many of the village’s houses were burned down yesterday, he’s determined to protect his home. He is also willing to join you. Oh, and he often goes hunting in the mountains, so don’t be too picky.”

“But he can’t even shoot a rabbit?!”

“He’ll get better. We’re old so we can’t come fight with you all, so in short you youngsters are the hope of humanity.”

Dad stared earnestly at Lin Tianyin, and he didn’t appear to be joking.

What else could Lin Tianyin say? She looked at Milona, but Milona looked like she had already been totally converted. Lin Tianyin silently massaged her head. This story already started going down a completely messed up direction…

In short, there was no prince, no knight captain, and no bishie mercenary. The next morning, Lin Tianyin had no choice but to examine this adventurer’s party that was formed entirely of ordinary villagers. Miller Jr.: A 16 year old redhead youth, average face, equipped with a cotton shirt and pants, and grass sandals, brandishing a longsword from the blacksmith’s shop that didn’t look very sharp. Gagaf: The village chief’s son, 17 years old, short blue hair with a center part, has a hunting hobby but never brings game back from the mountains, possesses slightly better equipment than Miller Jr. with leather clothes and boots, and carries a longbow that looked like it was about to fall apart…

As for Milona, she was wearing an outfit that the original work repeatedly described as “a pure white gauze skirt.” Lin Tianyin seriously questioned whether the original author’s vocabulary was so poor that she couldn’t come up with other phrases, to the point that every other word when Milona appeared would be full of bullshit like “a pure maiden entered with a sweet odor of purity.” It made Lin Tianyin think she was going insane over seeing the word “pure” everywhere.

“Don’t worry, we’ll definitely defeat the demon lord and save the world!”

Facing the villagers who came to see them off, Miller Jr. and Gagaf’s gazes were full of firm determination. What could Lin Tianyin even say? She was being forced to onto the road like this, and her parents were moving to the capital after they packed their things. Before they set out, the villagers also gave them a cloth sack, which contained — a bomb, 200 arrows, a bottle of holy water, 500 Beni⁶ (probably enough to eat two meals in a restaurant), a skeleton key (what the heck is this for?), and four boxed lunches. Since Lin Tianyin and Milona couldn’t understand the greater recovery scroll that their ancestors have left behind, they also placed it in the sack.

In short, Lin Tianyin prepared to start her journey.

While silently cursing her parents for being so willing to send their daughters off to die, Lin Tianyin led the party towards the mountain roads. Thus far, they received some advice from the village chief that in order to seal the demon lord, they needed a magic wand made from a unicorn’s horn. Since Lin Tianyin never finished reading this shoddy story, she had no idea where they might be able to obtain that kind of thingie. For now, they could only look for unicorns that lived in Sengel Lake, which was in the westernmost corner of the world, and figure the other parts out later. That said, would unicorns really be willing to give them their horns? That was an issue…

However, Lin Tianyin didn’t have much time to dwell on the unicorn problem, as they already encountered their first obstacle. After the earthquake last night, the mountain road was blocked by a boulder. In order to leave their remote mountain village, it was necessary to pass this mountain in order to reach the next town.

“We can wait for the kingdom’s knights to arrive. After all, the village has already sent out a carrier pigeon with a message that a dragon has been captured.”

Faced with Milona and the two villagers looking at her with such expectant eyes, Lin Tianyin shrugged her shoulders somewhat uncomfortably and spoke.

However, Milona and the two villagers didn’t blink in the slightest, and spoke seriously: “We don’t know how long that will be. We shouldn’t give up on our journey so easily.”

“Then what should we do? Use a bomb to blow up the boulder?” Lin Tianyin was a little irritated. This group of country bumpkins completely treated her as their leader, and asked for her opinion about everything.

“No, it might even cause a bigger landslide.” Gagaf firmly shook his head and looked at the boulder. “Shanoa, you go and get rid of it.”

“…Why me?” Lin Tianyin asked in surprise. “Can’t you two boys move it?”

“You’re the strongest one here. We can be pretend to help lift it for moral support, but don’t expect us to be actually useful at all.” Gagaf and Miller Jr. looked at Lin Tianyin together.

“…”

Lin Tianyin was rendered speechless by the bluntness of her companions, but the two villagers were actually right, even if their honesty was annoying. With no other choice, Lin Tianyin could only go and try to push the boulder — and it was certainly heavy. That said, she was starting to think at this rate the original male leads of the story weren’t going to show up… While she lost in thought, shadows gradually appeared in the sky, and a flock of enormous blue flying monsters flew towards them. They quickly surrounded the party.

“What’s going on?!” Lin Tianyin stared at the monstrous birds in the sky in surprise. Milona and Gagaf also similarly ducked close to the boulder in panic. Miller Jr. cried out in disbelief, “Those are Bluehead Eagles⁷ that often steal hunters’ prey! Normally, you’d only see one or two at a time, but why are there so many?! And they don’t ordinarily attack humans!”

‘Ever since the demon lord’s return, monsters have started to act up more frequently…‘ Suddenly, Lin Tianyin remembered something that the author had mentioned in the original work, and her forehead broke out in cold sweat. She hurriedly said to everyone, “Let’s hide behind the boulder! We’ll figure something out after they all leave!”

However, when Lin Tianyin cried out, an enormous blue-headed bird suddenly swept down. Its sharp talons seized the dazed Miller Jr., and lifted him off the ground in a flash.

“Miller Jr.—!!” Gagaf screamed. He prepared to draw his bow at the Bluehead Eagle that had seized Miller Jr. However, the bird soon flew too high into the sky and was promptly surrounded by a throng of monster birds. In a blink of an eye, the screaming Miller Jr. was pecked cleanly to pieces.

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Author’s Notes:

The reason for Miller Jr.’s convenient demise is because the author started to think that writing a four-person adventurer’s party was too annoying, so let’s cut it down to three people!

Climbing the initial rankings is too hard! If you liked this story, please leave a comment! TAT

Oh right, Gagaf and the little sister are permanent party members.

Thank you little ones for your support! Love you all =3= Happy new year everyone!

Translator’s Notes:

1. Completely nonsensical (水的不能再水): Literally, “water can’t be water”, which makes absolutely no sense, but that’s the point.
2. Tang (糖): Literally, “candy”, so the candy making family?
3. Aunties and uncles: In Chinese, calling someone an aunt/uncle does not necessarily mean they are related by blood.
4. Miller Jr. (小米勒): His name is virtually identical to his father’s, but has the extra diminutive “小” in front. In other words, his name is literally “Little Miller”.
5. Gagaf (加加夫): The pinyin here is Jiā jiā fū.
6. Beni (贝尼): A fictional currency.
7. Bluehead Eagles (蓝头鸟): Literally, “Blue-headed birds”.

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